What Marriage Trends Reveal About the Next Generation of Workers

How Millennials and Gen Z’s shifting views on marriage and commitment are reshaping loyalty, leadership, and workplace expectations.

Weddings are on my mind. But what do marriage trends reveal to us about leading the various generations?

This past weekend, my wife and I celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary. But what really got me thinking about shifting marriage trends was the fact that a few weeks ago, I officiated my first wedding. A young couple, both in their early-twenties, stood beaming at the altar, hearts full, ready to embark on this journey of marriage together.

But I couldn’t help but notice: they felt young. I mean, they were both born in the 2000s. (Yes, I just made thousands of my readers, myself included, feel ancient considering we were born in the 1900s, you’re welcome).

They weren’t immature. They just felt very young to be getting married.

Especially when compared to my Millennial peers, who mostly waited until their late twenties or early thirties to tie the knot. If I had to pull a number out of thin air for my generation, I’d guess the median age was 28. Millennials delayed marriage.

So when I saw this couple choosing marriage more than half a decade away from age thirty, it got me thinking: Is the generational pendulum swinging back to younger marriages, or is marriage an antiquated institution?

The Stats Are In: Marriage Is Getting Later

Millennials waited longer than any previous generation to get married. On average, men married around 30 and women around 28, the oldest median marriage ages in recorded U.S. history (U.S. Wedding and Family Trends by Generational Cohort, n.d.).

Compare that to the Silent Generation, who married as early as 20 for women and 23 for men, and often had three to four children. Today, Millennials typically have an average of 1.6 children, and many have none.

That’s a seven-year increase on average. That’s half the children.

What happened? And what does that mean for us as leaders leading out in a multi-generational society?

Well here are some of the key reasons marriage is later.

  • The rise of cohabitation as a socially accepted trial run. It isn’t just popular, it’s common. In 2023, about 9.1% of U.S. adults were cohabiting, up from just 3.7% in 1996 (Budget Model, 2025). Among Millennials, 12% were living with an unmarried partner in 2019, compared to just 8% of Gen Xers at a similar age (Pew Research Center, 2020). Cohabitation rates are now highest among younger adults: 52–58% of women aged 19–44 report having cohabited at some point (Census Bureau, 2006–2008).

  • A “me first” culture that encourages self-discovery before commitment. Millennials and Gen Z are delaying marriage to pursue education, careers, and personal development. According to Brides, younger generations delay saying "I do" to achieve financial independence, career goals, and self-awareness before settling down (Brides, 2019).

  • And frankly, a generation raised by Boomers who often didn’t stay married themselves. Let’s unpack that below.

Divorce: The Warning Label That Shaped a Generation

The Boomers brought us the highest divorce rates in U.S. history. By 1980, nearly half of first marriages ended in divorce (U.S. Census Bureau, as cited in U.S. Wedding and Family Trends, n.d.). That kind of relational instability leaves a mark.

Millennials (and many Gen Xers) watched families unravel, custody get negotiated, and houses get split, and they internalized the lesson: get married only if it is to the right person. Further, some parents stayed together in unhappy relationships because they got married too young or too quickly or just because everyone else their age was doing it. For some Boomers, the idea of being perceived as a failure was too great, so they stuck out their marriage despite it being toxic. And their kids took notice of that unhealthy dynamic as well.

Simultaneously, beginning with Gen X and being in full force as the Millennials came of age, the idea of cohabitation and even more casual sexual encounters was no longer taboo, but often was and still is considered a stop on the road to marriage. Nearly every movie and every TV show not only showed people cohabiting or participating in casual relationships, but praised it. The crass euphemism of this generation was often, “Try before you buy.” While vulgar, that refrain did, in fact, become more than locker-room talk, but rather a guiding principle.

The result? A generation that delayed commitment until they felt “ready.” But “ready” often meant financially stable, emotionally whole (good luck Gen Z), and with graduate degrees in hand. Being “ready” hopefully meant less heartache and not repeating the previous generation’s tumultuous illustration of marriage. That delay, created a cultural shift that’s still unfolding.

The Marriage Math Has Changed

Let’s call out the economics too.

Life is arguably more expensive now than it was, say 60 years ago. Blame internet, cell phone bills, and technology alone. Then add school debt and other luxury items now deemed a basic necessity. This has resulted in some delaying their marriages so they are financially “ready” while it seemingly propels others into marriage even younger.

When cell phones, laptops, streaming subscriptions, student loans, and rising rents are considered “essentials,” it’s no wonder two paychecks have become the norm. By 2011, only 31% of married families had a sole breadwinner, down from 70% in 1960 (U.S. Wedding and Family Trends, n.d.).

Financial insecurity doesn’t just delay weddings. It delays everything: home buying, kids, even second dates.

Today’s dual-income households aren’t about luxury, they’re about survival.

What This Says About Culture

We’re not watching a generation grow up late.

We’re watching a generation grow up cautious.

This isn’t recklessness, it’s restraint.

In some ways, it’s admirable. But there’s also a shadow side. I think what we’re seeing is fear disguised as freedom. A deep skepticism. A fear of failure. A belief that maybe marriage won’t last.

So people cohabitate. Postpone. Prioritize “working on themselves.”

They won’t get tied down and still have their independence, trying to reap the “best of both worlds”.

But here’s the irony, marriage is one of the best contexts for growth. Delaying commitment until you’re perfect means you’ll never get there.

What Leaders Need to Take From This

You might be wondering, “what does this mean for business leaders, entrepreneurs, or executives?”

Everything.

Because marriage trends aren’t just social trends. They’re cultural signals.

1. Commitment Takes Longer

Don’t expect instant loyalty from Gen Z hires or even Millennials for that matter. Like their approach to marriage, they need time. They view everything through a lense of give and take. And maybe a bit more take than give. They are slower to trust and desire authenticity. They feel that a job should meet their needs often before the feel they need to check all of the items of their employer’s checklist. Trust takes longer to earn, but often, when it’s there, it’s strong.

2. People Are Building Identity Before Belonging

Younger generations are asking, “Who am I?” before “Who are we?” So, team culture, values, and mission need to be clearly articulated before they commit.

3. Household Structures Are Fluid

Assuming everyone has a stay-at-home partner at home is outdated. Flexible work, dual-earner scheduling, and parental leave policies matter more than ever. There is a shared ownership in household responsibilities between partners, even illustrated by the statistic I shared earlier about breadwinners in the home.

Final Thought

Marriage isn’t dead. It’s just under revision.

We’re not watching the collapse of love. We’re watching a cultural negotiation between freedom and fear, individuality and intimacy, self-work and selflessness.

And as leaders of companies, teams, and communities, it’s our job to observe these trends and try to understand how they relate to those we lead.

Because how a generation defines love reveals everything about how it will manifest in life.

And from where I stood, watching that young couple say “I do” I don’t think hope is gone. I think for many, it’s arriving a bit later and in a different package.

Thank you for reading!

Until next time,

Works Cited

Budget Model. (2025, February 19). Change in American families: Favoring cohabitation over marriage. Penn Wharton Budget Model. https://budgetmodel.wharton.upenn.edu/issues/2025/2/19/change-in-american-families-favoring-cohabitation-over-marriage

Brides. (2019, August 20). Why getting married in your 30s is the new normal. https://www.brides.com/why-getting-married-in-your-30s-is-the-new-normal-4768894

Census Bureau. (2006–2008). Current Population Survey and National Survey of Family Growth (as cited in Wikipedia’s entry on Cohabitation). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohabitation

Pew Research Center. (2014, March 7). Millennials in adulthood. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2014/03/07/millennials-in-adulthood/

Pew Research Center. (2020, May 27). As Millennials near 40, they’re approaching family life differently than previous generations. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/05/27/as-millennials-near-40-theyre-approaching-family-life-differently-than-previous-generations/

U.S. Census Bureau. (n.d.). U.S. wedding and family trends by generational cohort [Internal report]. (As cited throughout article for historical median marriage age, divorce rates, and dual-income household statistics.)

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