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Walk into almost any coffee shop today and you might encounter it: the Gen Z stare.

Not the friendly barista smile or the chipper, “How can I help you?” Instead, a blank look like they’re staring straight through you, as if you were a transparent wall. I experienced it myself not long ago. A Gen Z employee stood at the counter, distant, cold, flat. For a moment, I wasn’t sure if I existed in her line of sight. Eventually, once we got past that barrier, she was unexpectedly sweet and helpful. But the stare lingered in my mind.

The Gen Z stare has taken social media by storm and is being widely covered even in the news. Depending on who you ask, it has a different meaning, a different purpose, and a different root cause.

Some call it unnerving. Others, rude. But here’s the question we need to ask as leaders: is this just a TikTok trend, or a window into something deeper happening in a generation raised on screens?

Generational Parallels: From Rock and Roll to the Blank Stare

Like Gen X before them, Gen Z grapples with deep distrust and skepticism. Analysts pin Gen X’s cynicism on formative events like Watergate, the energy crisis, Nixon, and later Clinton‑Lewinsky, creating a lasting disaffection toward institutions (Strauss & Howe, 1991; Twenge, 2023; Putnam, 2000). Pew data shows only about 19% of Gen X adults report trusting the federal government most of the time (Pew Research Center, 2015).

Similarly, Gen Z has matured amid tense political cycles, post‑Obama polarization, racial justice upheaval, and repeated institutional failures, the handling and impact of COVID-19, all fueling Gen Z’s skepticism. That emotional posture of withdrawal, cynicism, and emotional distance creates an interesting link between attitudes and outlooks of Gen X and Gen Z across decades, particularly if you are comparing both generations at the time they were early in the workforce.

But let’s not just isolate these two generations. Every generation has had its pushback. Boomers rebelled with long hair and protest signs, tie-dye and rock and roll. Gen X wore their cynicism on their sleeves, but kept their heads down, always skeptical and cautious, but generally compliant and diligent. Millennials got tattoos and piercings in mass waves, far more than previous generations, and were branded “entitled” when they asked for raises despite being perceived as lazy (Statista, 2023).

But here’s the difference: most generational resistance has been active. The Gen Z stare feels different—subconscious more than conscious. Less about tattoos or music, more about affect.

It’s worth asking: Have we always had these subtle, subconscious generational signals, but never seen them so visibly embodied until now?

Authenticity Meets Emotional Fatigue

Let’s give Gen Z some credit: their blank expression is not always disengagement. Some psychologists describe it as a mix of emotional fatigue and authenticity signaling (Well, 2025). In a culture that prizes “being real,” forcing a smile when you don’t feel like it seems fake. As I’ve stated before, one of the core desires of this generation is authenticity. It’s likely even stronger than the Silent Generation’s desire for loyalty or Boomers’ desire for respect.

Unlike previous generations who might plaster a grin for the sake of courtesy, many Gen Zers simply don’t. They’ve grown up in an era when therapy talk and mental health boundaries are mainstream. Smiling on demand can feel like dishonesty, disingenuous, unauthentic.

At the same time, screen saturation has conditioned them to process without outward cues. A few scrolls on TikTok can swing a viewer from hilarious to heartbreaking to inspiring without the screen caring whether they smile or frown, laugh or cry.

Research connects excessive screen time to lower empathy, social anxiety, and impaired emotional processing, particularly among adolescents. A UCLA study led by Patricia Greenfield found that sixth graders who spent five days at a nature camp without access to digital devices significantly improved their ability to read emotional cues compared to peers with regular screen exposure (Uhls et al., 2014). Other studies indicate that adolescents who engage in more than two hours of recreational screen time daily face elevated risks of anxiety, depression, and social phobia (Twenge & Campbell, 2018). Early childhood exposure to screens has also been associated with delayed empathy, reduced emotional self‑control, and weaker social skills (Radesky & Christakis, 2016; Paulus et al., 2019).

It’s not conscious rebellion. It’s conditioning. And leaders need to notice.

Why Leaders Find the Gen Z Stare Off‑Putting

To many of us, even Millennials, just one generation ahead, the stare feels uncomfortable. Cold. Off‑putting. I’ll admit, the coffee shop experience I mentioned earlier is one of many unusual stares I’ve received from a late teen or early 20-something.

Why? Because older generations (and yes, I'm grouping Millennials in here) were trained in interpersonal professionalism: eye contact, warm greetings, visible engagement. I’ll never forget one of my earlier jobs, where the CEO was obsessed with nonverbal cues. To him, everything signaled something. As our executive leadership team prepared for a board meeting with partners from the venture capital firms that had invested in us, he gave us a refresher course on body language. Not just body language, though; he even rearranged our chairs, ensuring we sat in a specific order and faced a certain direction. His reminder was simple but unforgettable: your body language speaks before you do.

But even in that scenario, I was being taught and brought along. My parents always made me look adults in the eyes, just as I require of my kids when they talk with someone. These interpersonal social skills were taught. They were required. They were expected.

And yet, it seems that some of these basic life lessons skipped a generation. So, when Gen Z enters the workforce, you have an individual who is arguably socially immature when it comes to non-verbal cues. They must be taught.

For leaders who expect that presence, the Gen Z stare feels like absence. But labeling it rudeness misses the deeper truth.

What’s Underneath the Stare

Research suggests several drivers:

• Screen Time & Social Skills: Adolescents with high screen use show reduced emotional regulation and empathy development (Digital Citizen Academy, 2025). I feel that we often rely on technology as a crutch to explain why the generations turn out the way they do. While technology played an undeniable role, it was also the parents and leaders who did not know how to properly set up boundaries that contributed to the behaviors exhibited by technology-native generations today. It was the parents who did not want to make an enemy of their child and instead treated them like a peer that led to some of these underdeveloped social skills. So yes, technology is a catalyst, but how it is handled ultimately falls on leaders who are not leading.

• Pandemic Effect: Many Gen Z teens missed critical social development years in Zoom classrooms, reinforcing flat affect in in-person interactions. There is no denying that the pandemic had far-reaching implications on the psyche of humankind, particularly school-aged kids. They spent anywhere from a semester to as long as three years staring at a screen. They could see their peers heads via video, but often that was it. No other body language. And what is more, often those peers had other windows pulled up and were watching Netflix, playing a game, or messaging friends. They were in a virtual class, but totally disconnected.

• Emotional Boundary‑Setting: Raised by Millennials who normalized therapy, Gen Z values boundaries and authenticity over performative positivity (Pew, 2020). I sounds like a broken record, but authenticity may be one of the most desired traits of Gen Z. They are tired of fake. They are tired of empty promises. And, being more emotionally aware (a.k.a. sensitive) than previous generations, they try to quite literally “protect” themselves by seeming disengaged or disinterested. This is what they call emotional boundary-setting. Some excuse the Gen Z stare as just that, a protection from giving off a false impression or engaging under false pretenses. On top of this, the high levels of Gen Z being medicated for some sort of anxiety or depression, there is often a side effect of these medications referred to as “emotional blunting,” which can cause that flat affect so often exhibited by many Gen Zers (University of Cambridge, 2023). Of course, medication is not the sole reason for the phenomenon, just an intersting anecdote.

So is the Gen Z stare simply an emotional protection? Is it an involuntary reaction? A result of medication? A side effect of too much screen time? Or is it just a fabricated TikTok fad?

While I think there is absolutely some truth to a lack of refined social skills, such as eye contact or speaking up when spoken to with more than just a “yeah” or “nah”, I think that the stare is largely just a trend that reveals a larger opportunity for leaders.

A Leadership Opportunity: Ask, Don’t Assume

The aforementioned points may each play some role in the stare. But at the core, I would argue it is an opportunity for leaders to lead and help develop the next generation.

So what should a leader do? The worst approach is to ignore the stare (or any other bad behvior) or worse, to gossip about it with peers. Instead, use it as an opportunity to equip the next generation of leaders. Just as that CEO once rearranged our boardroom and reminded me (and the other executives in the room, many with decades of experience) that even seasoned leaders must be intentional about presence, we now have the same opportunity: to train and raise up the next generation.

A conversation always goes a long way about why our expressions can impact others. But, if you don’t know where to start, you can meet it with curiosity:

• “What are you thinking about right now?”

• “Is something keeping you from greeting our guests warmly?”

• “How can we make someone feel more welcome today?”

Frame it not as a reprimand, but as an invitation. My mom always reminded me of the “preciousness of others.” It’s the idea that our actions shape others’ experiences, not just our own—sort of an extension of the Golden Rule.

The Pendulum Ahead: Gen Alpha

Generational momentum swings from one generation to the next. We challenge the way things have been done, overcorrect, and then we have to recalibrate. I believe the pendulum is already swinging back. Many Millennial parents are limiting screen time, influenced by books like The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt or the campaign of Wait Until 8th, delaying giving smartphones to kids. Young parents are sending kids outside to play, rediscovering in‑person connection.

Gen Alpha may not be hyper‑expressive, but I predict a recalibration: a return to baseline interpersonal norms, shaped by both digital fluency and intentional analog presence.

Final Thought

I believe the Gen Z stare isn’t rebellion for rebellion’s sake. It’s not even primarily about rudeness. It’s a subconscious signal of a generation conditioned by screens, steeped in authenticity, and weary of performative smiles.

Yes, it can be off‑putting. Yes, it can hurt cross‑generational communication. But it’s also a leadership opportunity.

Because the question isn’t whether Gen Z will keep staring, it’s whether we, as leaders, will finally start seeing the opportunity to inspire positive change.

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